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I lasted exactly one week in a corporate environment. Here’s Why.

You may be thinking, Kelly, who stays at a job for only one week?

Me. I do.

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I jumped in full force, knocked it out of the park, dealt with insanely fragile male egos, and then got fired without an actual legitimate reason. True story.


Before I go on, I want to add a couple caveats:

One: I do not believe all corporate culture is toxic. Two: Not everyone is in a position where they can risk losing their jobs.



Okay, now I shall get to it. This endeavor began when I decided to get a job as I am growing my holistic personal styling and confidence building coaching practice so I have a more steady income and wouldn't have to worry about bills.

(This is a dilemma that almost ALL entrepreneurs work through).


And I did it. I found THE PERFECT JOB with a company I was really excited about, that complimented my own practice, and would provide stability and flexibility to grow my own business with more ease. After relishing in the picture that was painted for me during my interview, I could not be more pumped.


In true Virgo fashion, I went out and purchased some new office supplies, reorganized my desk, sharpened my pencils (okay I just broke out my new mechanical ones because I love them), and I.dove.in. I caught on quickly, worked overtime to study and create outlines and spreadsheets, and felt like I was going to knock this thing out of the park.

And I did.


During my training, I began to see some things that made me viscerally uncomfortable. Some of which included actual lying, misleading, and manipulation ( Not to mention textbook gaslighting and super narcissistic behavior). The first time I questioned my manager's lying, he looked like a deer in the headlights. Then in true recovering people pleaser fashion, I found myself comforting my male boss in his discomfort.


I worked really intentionally to ‘pick my battles,' thinking once I was through the training, I would succeed by doing things with integrity and not have to work near as closely with these people I was loosing more respect for by the day.


But things got worse, I spoke up and this time, I let my boss sit in his discomfort without trying to fix it.


#growth.


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I have to admit, by speaking up, calling out unethical behavior, and shining just a little too bright too soon, I knew I was rocking the boat. But when the boat tipped over and I got fired, it was abrupt.


Even though I knew it was risky to be true to myself in this environment, being fired knocked the wind out of me as though I had been punched in the gut. I’ve lived on this earth for 36 years and am still shocked by the way some people operate in the world.


After my big strong brave moment, I broke down and cried; a lot.

All of that old programming came up in me:

“You were lucky to have a job. This is just the way things go. You should have just kept your head down and kept it moving. You should not call out your boss because he is your authority..”


EW. Right?

But, this was my old programming that still likes to cause some glitches in my updated way of being.


If I encountered this situation maybe even a few years ago, I probably would have listened to this old conditioning, played the part until my soul was sucked dry and I was so miserable that I couldn't take it anymore. I would then need a very long recovery time to come back to myself.


I know this because that is exactly what’s happened in the past. I’d ignore my body’s signals and justify things until I was miserable. It was all of those times of feeling what it feels like to abandon myself that gave me the gumption not to abandon myself this time around.


I definitely went through a grieving process and leaned into my support system. You know how when you go through a break up, you know it was the right thing, but that does not take away the sadness of losing that person and grieving the dream of what could have been. I felt that same way after losing this job.


After continuing to process it all, I began to feel a sense of relief and empowerment.


I was speaking with a friend and sharing the gremlins of experiences during my encounter with corporate life. After I was finished, she looked at me and said, “Kelly, you have this incredible business. What is stopping you from going all in full time with it?”

Her words watered a part of myself that had been dwindling.


I began to come back to life on the inside. I thought to myself,"Okay, if I can jump in and give 110% and make this company a great deal of money in a short period of time , then what the hell is stopping me from fully investing in this beautiful company that I have created??"


You may be thinking, but Kelly, aren’t you a confidence coach? Isn't this what you help people cultivate? And the answer is yes. Yes I am.


And I am ON THE JOURNEY, too. I am continuing to peel back layers and layers of conditioning that have kept me small in different areas of my life.


With as whiplashed as this experience made me feel, it crystallized some truths into my bones that I am grateful for:



1. I am not going to be made small or become jaded.

After experiencing some very valid anger and sending some snarky emails where I spoke my mind, (I am not that evolved), I’m walking away with more knowledge about who I am and a deeper understanding of my own value.


2. Life is too short to bend and mold to fit into spaces that aren’t meant for me.

I felt a pressure to water myself down because other people were uncomfortable. Being who we are is our superpower. I used to hear that and think it sounded cheesy. BUT who doesn't love cheese ( unless you're lactose intolerant, but you know what I mean).

I know I am not the only one who has been in this kind of situation. Truth is, we deserve to be in spaces where we do not have to abandon ourselves to be accepted and where our skill sets and humanity are valued and respected.


3. I am powerful.

While this experience was painful, it provided me an opportunity to speak up in a way that I had not been able to at other times I was made to feel small. I listened to what my body was telling me and while the outcome was not my ideal at the moment, I felt relieved and lighter. I felt connected to myself. I learned that I could trust myself even when it meant dismantling my ego’s little version of what I thought was best for me. Because the truth is, I was investing my talent, energy, and soul into an environment that was not worthy of it.

To really understand my value in that way helped me to truly connect to my own power.


4. The most important relationship I have is the one with myself. Self trust is brave. I am worthy of being able to live a life in alignment with what I desire in my soul.


5. If I focused on my own business with even 75% of the amount of focus I spent at someone else’s company, I would be so successful. So, if you have made it this far. Thank you for sharing in this experience with me! I hope these truths bring you even more courage to be true to yourself in all areas of your life.



So what’s next?

I am leaning into these epiphanies, and am excited to share with you that I am going to fully commit, dive into my business, give it my all, with the risk of failure and all.


(When we do not give something we truly believe in and want, our all, it keeps us safe.)

It may still involve getting income from other avenues as well, but I am no longer going to stay small.


I help women who feel stuck in self doubt uncover self trust, self compassion, and self confidence, while creating a soul-centered personal style that will give them the grit and gumption to go after their dreams., you can find out more here.


While creating an authentic personal style is the avenue we use, the process is about so much more than clothes. It is about showing up for yourself in all stages of life and in all of your forms; in love. It is about allowing yourself to be truly seen. It is about unapologetically owning who you are. This is the work that I do with my clients.


If you know someone who is at a place in their life where they want to lean into their inner confidence and show up in the world with an authentic creative expression and personal style, I'd be honored if you would send them my way.

(kellyelizabethcoaching.com or email me at kelly@kellyelizabethcoaching.com)


No matter where you are on your journey, I hope these takeaways from my stint in the corporate world help you lean into even more self trust and self love

(super vital ingredients in self confidence).




I will leave you with a little inspiring wisdom from Gandhi:

" We but mirror the world. All the tendencies present in the outer world are to be found in the world of our body. If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him. This is the divine mystery supreme. A wonderful thing it is and the source of our happiness. We need not wait to see what others do.”- Mahatama Gandhi


Cheers my friends!


With Gumption,

Kelly Elizabeth


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